Wait, Don’t Kill Yourself When Your Life Gets Hard

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These words of encouragement cannot replace professional help, but perhaps they can give you hope to get through one night at a time. Our experiences are unique but not totally. You are not the only person who couldn’t find hope in the moment, let alone a moment away. But what if, just what if there is hope but you just can’t feel it but it’s there if you know where to feel.

I remember the night I thought I was losing my mind. Something had happened. My life spun out of control, my control. My head spun because I was trying to find a solution that would reinstate me as the queen of my life. I thought, how could this be happening? Surely, I can defy reality. I was the boss of me. God nor any other force was in control of my life. After that day, things changed.

This is me looking backwards so it’s easier for me than it is for you in this moment. But that’s what I’m here for. I went ahead of you to let you know that there is life after today if you can just hang on tonight. Your heart may ache in your stomach every day. Emotional pain can cause physical pain. When Billie Holiday said good morning to heartache, it wasn’t just a thought. Sleep allows us to escape the pain for a little while, but the sun wakes up the ache. Those who haven’t experienced it don’t understand. Here is something you may not understand on that side of a mended heart. The pain goes away.

Enduring the Pain on the Journey to Healing

The goal is not to mute the pain but to heal. Muting can come in different forms like drinking and drugs. They numb the very thing that tells us there’s a problem. Instead, embrace this season of life even though it may be so painful feeling the pain, it is the path to wholeness. Wholeness is not getting your way. Wholeness is God getting His way in your life. Wait… yes, God. Let’s deal with the God thing. (Getting to know God)

The struggle for control is a fake battle that we will never win. We don’t need to win it. The best thing we could do is lose the battle. God’s idea for us is infinitely better than what you have in mind. I know you think you know. I thought I knew. But what if, just what if you don’t. The pain we feel, the ache, may just be a longing for God and His plan for our lives. But we are busy fighting, not realizing the true source of the pain. Why? Because we listen to people who have never made a world or created a person telling us that what we want is right and the reason we hurt is because we can’t get it, the opposite of the truth.

Admittedly, walking through the pain is painful, not only because we are going against God but also because relinquishing control over our desires hurts. But let me share with you, the view from the other side is so worth it. If we heal right, the pain transforms us. The process cracks open a sacred part of our hearts where joy lives that only God can lead us to. Let me warn you, this is not something you can do alone. God carried me. It’s okay if you go limp in His arms. He can carry you. What does that practically look like?

A Practical Look at the Countercultural Journey to Healing

In the morning when heartache says good morning, say good morning back. Recognize that this is the season that you are in, and it will hurt. Easier said than done but it is doable. If you have never spoken to God before and you’re not sure He exists, you can say, “God, I’m not sure if you are there. Help me to believe.” That’s a good prayer to pray whenever your ache gives you a kick. Know that you are not the only person who has experienced the depths of despair.

If you work, get dressed and head to work. I couldn’t work for a while. My pain had knocked me off my feet. I cried… a lot. I read my Bible a lot. When I first started reading the Bible, I didn’t have a clue, but I read. Simple prayer, “God, help me understand what you are saying to me in this book.” While God is wonderful and majestic, He understands plain language. Your words don’t need to be grand. Work, eat, sleep. Seek God daily and all day long.

The Hope of Healing

The process took months. I was able to work after a while. One day as I was walking along, I noticed something different. I did a double take to be sure but could not find my heartache anywhere. Surprisingly, I didn’t end up getting what I wanted but what I got was good. I realized that I could not control the details of my life, but I learned to trust God. Think about trusting God with your hard situation. What if, just what if you let Him wipe your tears away and lead you on a journey of healing? Can you open your mind to the possibility.

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit” (Roman 15:13).

This month we’re talking about hope in light of discouragement, future plans, and the Gospel . Read our last blog!

Are you or someone you know in a mental health crisis? Call 988 or go to SAMHSA’s website to get help!

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